Q&A: Should I Tell The Husband’s Wife he is Gay and Sleeping With Me?

gay husbandQ&A: Should I Tell The Husband’s Wife he is Gay and Sleeping With Me?

We met on Grindr. I live in a major city, he lived in a small suburb about 40 minutes away, so we always met up in my city for dates and my apartment for sex for the past 3 years, once or twice a week. Plus he went to a gym that was close to my apartment, so he was always in the area, there was never really a reason for me to go out to the suburbs. We were never exclusive, and he’s bisexual, so I knew he was having sex with both men and women while we were doing our thing.

One day without any warning he blocked my number. I needed to know what I’d done wrong. So I started sleuthing online, trying to find an e-mail address I use to write him, if only to get closure. He has a very generic name (like “John Smith” but not actually “John Smith). I don’t use Facebook, and so when he said he didn’t have Facebook, it didn’t really raise any red flags for me. But I got on Facebook and start searching for everyone with his name: no luck. I knew he was friends with a trainer at the gym, so I found the trainer on Facebook, and started going through his friends list: no one with that name. But I found someone else with his picture. And he was married.

gay husbandI’ve been coming to terms with the fact that I’ve been having sex for the past 3 years with a married man whose name I didn’t even know. Not only did he tell me his name was “John Smith” but he told me he’d been engaged but broken up with his fiancee because he’d caught her cheating, and while he was heartbroken, realized he was bisexual and decided to explore that side of his sexuality. Instead, he was married and he’d been cheating on his wife.

A part of me wants to contact his wife to tell her he’s been having unprotected sex with other women and men. I don’t know whether it’s out of concern for her health and safety–I’m on PreP but I doubt she is–or to satisfy my need for vengeance. But another part of me doesn’t want to out his sexuality. I don’t know what to do.

Venice’s response to gay husband

gay husbandInteresting question.  Part of me says tell the wife, because she deserves to know.  The other part of me says, snitches get stitches.  

Let’s try to figure out why he blocked you.

The chances are, when he blocked you he was already caught.  Especially if he blocked you for no reason and without warning.  Whether it be she found emails or texts from you two, or another man (or woman).   In the process of working it out, most people require all outside contact is shut off, cold turkey.   Whether it be from her, or from him showing her that he will never do it again.  A guilty conscious, him trying to do what is right, or her doing it for him and him being cooperative.   Him reaching out “one last time” for closure, shows he cared.   We have to assume he told his wife he doesn’t care about any of them, it was just sex.

Sound familiar?

If you do reach out, just know, the wife is more likely to believe him than you anyway.  You may cause an argument, but he will more than likely find a way to label you as some weird stalker from the gym.  He’ll downplay anything he has done. And once they’ve cleared that up, him ever contacting you again is definitely out of the picture. 

My advice is let him go and move on.  If he has already made the steps to block you, and it really was without reason, then she probably already knows.  Blocking you seems reactive to them probably getting in a fight over her seeing the emails herself.  If you ever want to see him again, show him you can keep your relationship discrete and do your own thing.  

Remember, you aren’t just calling her and letting her know he is a cheater, you are calling her and letting her know he is a cheater and gay.  Be careful.

Ryan’s response to gay husband

gay husbandIt seems like him blocking you for no reason would be the biggest hint that she already knows.  He was probably already caught.  His reaction was to block everyone to show her he is a changed man.  Telling the wife only shows that he will never be able to trust you again, if he ever did (he has been lying to you the whole time).  You’re not going to be the hero that saves her from STDs, but you will get that revenge you may subconsciously want.  

I find it hard to believe after 3 years with “John Smith” you didn’t already know the deal.  I think now that you lost contact,  you are desperate and trying to think of any way to get back in contact with him, even if its through his wife.  Start the healing process and let it go.   

 

Question for Women: I Just Had The Worst Sex Of My Life, TWICE. How do I deal with this?

worst sex of my lifeQuestion for Women: I Just Had The Worst Sex Of My Life, TWICE. How do I deal with this?

Oh my god. The pain. RIP vagina.

I’m 26 and the guy I’m sleeping with is 22. Initially, I was worried because of the age difference (especially in bed per sexual experience) but we’ve been friends for years and there’s always been a lot of sexual tension between us. So I invited him over to hang out and next thing I know I’m being jackhammered.

worst-sex-of-my-lifeNow I’m not here to insult anyone who enjoys being jackhammered, and I am going to mention some rough sex is really good when it’s right. HOWEVER, this was undeniably the most painful and worst sexual experience I’ve ever had… twice..

First of all, this guy has a big package. Girth and length, so I knew it would take some easing into. Second of all, I could immediately tell how awfully desensitized he was when there was little to no reaction to my hands/mouth. And third, he didn’t even orgasm after an hour of sex and an hour of pounding me. I’m so incredibly shocked and disturbed by the entire ordeal I had no idea where to get it out but here.

rougher sexThe first time we had sex he went wild. He was ripping me around the bed, licking my butthole, putting fingers in every hole possible, choking me, jackhammering me. (Talk about boundaries?!) I was so shocked by it all I was barely able to communicate properly. I was so uncomfortable. I mentioned to him “do you ever have slow sex?” “woah relax” but he was not taking any hints. I actually had to stop him after 45 minutes because my vagina was so raw and he was not even close to climaxing. I chalked it up to him being young and nervous and just trying to impress me by doing anything he can think of but I was so wrong.

I figured I would mention it to him if we ended up in bed again. The second time when we were making out I made a joke that I was scared to sleep with him because he’s A) huge and B) crazy (not in a good way) he needs to slow down.. So he spent extra time touching me, going down on me, was slow to jump into sex, but when we did get into sex he was insane. He had no reaction to me riding him, NONE. Instead, he fucked me even harder than the last time and the only way he could cum was by literally jackhammering me forever. It was fucking horrible and so painful.

worst sexHere’s the thing. We were good friends before all of this and it’s safe to say I never want to sleep with him again, but he is really into me. He texts me to hang out all the time, takes me on nice dates, spends hours talking to me.. but the sex is just terrible.. I know he’s going to ask what’s up when I tell him I’m not interested in sleeping with him and I want to lay it all out for the poor guy before he goes into his prime 20’s thinking that’s how women want to be fucked. He’s clearly got a major death grip/porn addiction and it’s disturbing. So how do I navigate this?!!

Venice’s response to worse sex of my life

Interesting story.  This is extremely simple to navigate… tell him.

Because sexual experiences are subjective and some women find getting their brains fucked out by a 20 year old stud as great sex, I don’t think he will be ruined by your preferences.  Just make sure he knows, it’s not all women, but your preference.   It also may be because who wants to be jackhammered and have your pussy fucked raw by a guy you see as an adorable pal that you chit chat with but never really wanted to fuck in the first place?

Just let him know your deal.  

On another note, I find it unusual you can tell he has a “death grip/porn addiction” based off being jackhammered by a young stud that wants to fuck your brains out.  

Ryan’s response to worse sex of my life

I agree with Venice.  Although the story is fun, this is an extremely easy one.   Tell him.

As far as riding him and being able to tell he has death grip?  Huh?  Being rode is a much different sensation than doggy, missionary, or any type of penetration where the man can control how his penis pistons inside a woman.  In fact, I’d say being rode gives the least sensation simply because it kind of just stirs the penis inside the women, just rubbing around her insides, rather than pistoning in and out.  It’s a good sensation, but a lot of guys will flip you over and really fuck you down before we orgasm.  And it’s not because of death grip or a porn addiction.  It’s because that stirring sensation really gets us horny but not quite enough sensation to get that release.  Frustrated, we really take it out on a woman’s pussy when we get on top of her.

The same can be said for the hand or mouth, as a lot of men just can’t orgasm from oral sex.  A mouth feels amazing, but just can’t compare to a tight vagina.

Otherwise, good luck navigating this friendship.  I’d say you got in over your head with a guy that had been dreaming of fucking your brains out, while you saw him as a casual friend that you probably don’t desire.  And you really don’t want your brains fucked out by a guy you have little desire for.  Probably a bit embarrassing to get your back blown out by a guy you kind wanted on the side as you found a real love interest.

 

PLEASE HELP! I got a glass dildo stuck inside me. How do I remove it?

 

PLEASE HELP! I got a glass dildo stuck inside me. How do I remove it?

I accidentally got a glass “butt plug” stuck inside my anal cavity while I was masturbating.   I took an enema and I’m currently waiting on the toilet.

Any suggestions?

Update 1:  glass dildo stuck inside me

I’m at the ER waiting for an X-RAY. Please y’all, do NOT use things that are not meant for your butt. It’s not worth it. I’m so disappointed in myself because this could have easily been avoided.

Update 2:

They could see it in the X-ray and they said it’s pretty low in the rectum (thank god). The doc is going to perform a rectal exam and remove by hand/using an instrument.

Update 3: glass dildo stuck inside me

The doc did the rectal exam and wasn’t able to retrieve it. OH MY GOD IT FKN HURT. He could see it but the object is in such a difficult position; making it difficult to retrieve. I will have to go through a more invasive procedure. This fkn sucks guys. I THANK you all for pushing me to go into the ER. This could have escalated terribly.

Wow! thanks for the attention and awards guys! I did not expect my post to gain this much traction. My interaction with all of you has certainly made my situation better. I am still waiting for surgery to call the doc back.

Update 4: glass dildo stuck inside me

Surgery department called back and is doing my case today. I just finished taking the COVID test (OMG ALSO) and I am now awaiting transport. Thanks for your support everyone. You all are really making this process easier.

Update 5: glass dildo stuck inside me

This all feels like a dream, or nightmare I should say. I am still in my room waiting for the COVID test to come back. Once that happens, I will finally go through a minimally invasive surgery🤣. Again, THANK YOU ALL. I have been on Reddit for the past hour, reading all of your comments and replying. I will update y’all more soon. You all are legends in my eyes 🤙

Update 6: glass dildo stuck inside me

40 mins later, I’m about to go into the OR. See y’all later.

Update 7: 

I’m in the post op room and they got it out without any complications. YAY! I’m feeling very groggy and I’m awaiting for my ride to pick me up. The general anesthesia was crazy. Although I should be happy for not having any surgical complications, I shouldn’t even be here in the first place! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, take this post as a lesson for everyone to use proper sex toys. I literally have just gone through hell for something so stupid and unnecessary.

Update 8: glass dildo stuck inside me

Hey everyone. It’s 4AM, and I just got home. This has been a wild ride. I’m reading through this post, and my god you guys are funny😂. Y’all really helped me get through this so I appreciate every single upvote, comment, and award. I am feeling no effects from the procedure except a little bloating. I’m still a little groggy.

If this ever happens to you, please please seek medical attention. Take deep breaths and don’t panic. You can try to fish it out with your fingers but please be sure to not push it in further like I did. As soon as you don’t feel it with your fingers, brave up and go to the ER. Taking a laxative may help or push it even deeper. I initially planned to wait and poop it out or pull it out but you guys really encouraged me to go to the ER. All of you honestly might have saved me from terrible terrible health consequences. I have learned my lesson and will never ever ever stick anything up my ass besides sex toys. I hope this post saves someone from potentially doing the same thing.

Stay safe everyone, and enjoy responsibly.

Note:

Oh yea, some of you don’t know if I’m male or female. I am a straight male who likes butt play. So being in the hospital is even more awkward than it has to be.

 

Source:  Reddit (post closed, no more comments)

Question for men: Are you against having your ass touched and/or tasting your own cum? And if so, why?

eat your own cumQuestion for men: Are you against having your ass touched and/or tasting your own cum? And if so, why?

I’m asking because every single man I’ve been with (including my current boyfriend) has been firmly against those two things. The men I’ve fucked have constantly touched/entered my ass enjoying anal.  They have also shoved their fingers in my mouth after fingering me without it even being a second thought or discussed.  Even though I am totally cool with it, I just want to know why men won’t kiss me after cumming in my mouth.  It seems silly to me I don’t get it.

Venice’s response to tasting your own cum

I find it silly as well.  In fact, for me, this isn’t even something I’d accept.  Anything I feel like doing, I am going to do to my husband.  We can even mix those two scenarios together.  If I decide to finger his asshole and stick it in his mouth, he better suck on my fingers.  I’d be upset if he didn’t.  With that said, we are married.  It took a long time for us to get comfortable with each other, trust each other with all our dark skeletons and kinks, and be able to do whatever it is two humans can possibly do to each other without having to worry about judgement.

I’d think with dating or random hook ups, the man risks kissing you after he cums and not knowing if you will keep his secret.  He hasn’t talked to you enough to know you would love that type of thing.  He also hasn’t talked to you enough to know that you wouldn’t tell every single friend how he licked his cum off your chest after he came.  Whether we accept it or not, a man doing those types of things may emasculate him to other men that hear about it.  So they keep their guards up. 

Until they trust you… and then you can stand them on their heads and milk their cocks into their own mouths.

Ryan’s response to tasting your own cum

Without a lot of experience with women other than my wife, I can’t say what I would be like as a single man.   I do think women who are okay with tasting themselves, shows me they are confident, know their body is clean, know their pussy is good, and to taste themselves is a huge turn on for me.  If a woman was grossed out by her own body, I would probably be turned off.  Or just want to get it over with as fast as possible.  

Let’s flip the coin.

If a man eats his cum, or goes down and eats his own creampie, not all women find that attractive.  They may actually see it as emasculating, or beta.  Something cucks do.  Although we don’t kink shame here at fuckblogging, not all women want a man that is beta or a cuck.  So a man has to worry about looking weak, or looking like a beta to a female.  Even if he wanted to kiss you after he came in your mouth.  It goes back to the idea of women can do gay things and not be judged by other women, while men doing gay things are looked down on by straight men.  

And as far as boyfriends, dates, or short-term relationships go, a man may just stay reserved.  If you break up with him, who knows who you will tell about how he gargles his own semen after he drinks it from your vagina.  Like Nessa said, it’s probably something you will find out men enjoy when you are in long-term relationships, or married.

 

Have you ever lost a condom inside your vagina?

condom lost and foundLost a Used Condom Inside My Vagina! 

Have you ever lost a condom inside your vagina for 4 days?  Yea, me either.  But I did read an interesting question from from a young lady regarding her experience.  We have decided to do a bit of back and forth dialogue regarding the topic and different scenarios.  

I’m 20 years old and have a story about a missing condom.  So  yesterday I was in intense pain while peeing and immediately called my doctor for UTI screening which I have never had before. The rapid test came back negative and my urine was sent to a lab for more accurate results. The day continues on and the pain decreases as I continue to hydrate and drink cranberry juice…weird.

This morning I pee with little to no pain and when I stand up a piece of condom falls out of me and I’m STUNNED. Never in my life has this happened before and I hadn’t had sex since Friday which means the piece of condom has been in me for 4 days now. We knew the condom had broke, but I didn’t realize that it had broken off inside of me. There is still SLIGHT discomfort when I pee but nothing even remotely comparable to yesterday morning.

I really just cannot stop thinking about this and was wondering if anyone has had similar experiences and knows if there are precautions I should be taking. We are both presumably STI free and I am getting tested soon regardless. I am on the pill and he pulled out, but is there anything else I should be keeping on my radar (toxic shock, infection of some kind, etc), or am I being paranoid? Can anyone share similar experiences?

Venice:  I have never had this experience but I do wonder why it would hurt to urinate if she didn’t have a UTI.  Unsure how a condom inside her vagina would hurt to urinate.

Ryan:  Maybe it was covering her urethra and filling up inside her like a water balloon every time she went to the bathroom?

Venice:  Oh my gosh!  How do you walk around with a water balloon inside your vagina and not notice!

Another experience with losing a condom:

I had a condom in me all night and the next day. I had no idea and no pain it just fell out when I peed thank fuck. I leaned after that to always check it’s been disposed of and to pay attention to the guy taking it off and if I didn’t see ask.

Venice:  Is it like a style for guys to wear baggy condoms now? wtf?

Ryan:  Not uncommon for a guy to buy magnum condoms when they do not need a larger size.

Venice:  Oh yea, I remember that article.  It’s either an ego thing or  they just have no idea what they are doing when they put a condom on.

Ryan:  What bothers me though is what type of guy pulls out of  a woman and notices he doesn’t have a condom on anymore, but doesn’t say anything?  

Venice:  The worst kind of guy.

Ryan:  It’s not like your keys or your cell phone.  You don’t forget where you put that dang condom while having sex.  

Venice:  I can’t imagine pulling out and looking down at your unprotected penis and saying, “Where did I leave that damn condom again?  Ugh, let me retrace my steps.”

Ryan:  I agree.   I would be horrified if my condom fell off after sex.  

Venice:  Yea, but some guys do this on purpose.  It’s like a weird form of stealthing.

Ryan:  That’s crazy.

Venice:  And illegal.

Another experience with losing a condom:

This happened to me quite a bit, my body rejected condoms and they either always split or the whole thing ended up inside me and had to be fished out. Longest I had some in there was a couple days but I did not have pain.

I would go back to the doctors just in case If I were you!

Ryan:  This is a common thing?

Venice:  I don’t think so, but we never used condoms so I just don’t have those types of experiences.

Ryan:  She just seems way to experienced.  I mean, she has fishing expeditions and has a leaderboard on how long certain boyfriends left condoms inside her?

Venice:  I wonder if she has ever speared Moby Dick?

Ryan:  Oh my…  do you think you could lose a condom inside yourself?

Venice:  Well, if you never told me, probably.  It’s not like I sweep my vagina for foreign objects after we have sex together!

Ryan:  But if you knew, would it be hard to find inside your vagina?

Venice:  If I knew, no.  The vagina isn’t that complicated.   But I have experience exploring mine and other women, so I am no stranger to how a vagina should feel.  And truthfully, there isn’t much to it.  I think the term “fished out” is appropriate, regardless of how bad or funny that may sound.

Ryan:  I am sure blogs like these get all the girls super excited about finally having sex with their boyfriends and deep sea fishing inside their vaginas for lost condoms!

Venice:  This is definitely on every girls secret bucket list.  Have my boyfriend’s used and full condom sit inside my vagina for days, fill up like a water balloon when I urinate until it burns, and eventually come out in parts and pieces.

Ryan:  Every girls dream.