Deepthroating: My Experience Learning To Deepthroat w/ Video

The original video we uploaded to our xhamster actual account was deleted years ago. I hated how I looked, my weight, etc. However, the internet never forgets. We reuploaded the file for the blog.  Although not the most complimenting version of me, it is actually a few days after I learned to deepthroat.  Blog and video originally shared on ( November 9, 2012)  

I didn’t know or understand what deepthroating was the first time I heard about it.  I thought it was simply taking a dick into your mouth as far as you could, or rather, as far as your body would allow.  My husband would tell me to deepthroat him, so I’d press his dick down as hard as I can in the  back of my mouth for a few seconds and gag.  I thought if you gagged it was deepthroating.  I was happy that I could let him feel the back of my throat and show him I could gag for him.   He was happy to feel the back of my throat, and truthfully, he took pride in his dick making me gag.  Ladies, it really isn’t a necessity to learn to deepthroat, because the truth is, some men prefer to feel superior.  It’s an ego thing, and men want to conquer us in every way.  However, to deepthroat a man is conquering him.  It’s empowering.  Watching a man’s face when you make his pride and joy disappear before his very eyes and leave him with what looks like  you eating his vagina, is emasculating. But, these men, who get deepthroated, learn to pride themselves in their woman’s ability.  Their pride is transferred onto their partner being able to do what no other women could.  And, it takes a real man to realize that he met his match.   But there is much more to it. Deepthroating has become one of the most sought-after talents that I never knew I wanted to learn.

Upon researching forums asking “Can your girl deepthroat?” I’ve heard of men (and even women) calling deepthroaters “slutty” or “whores,” but these are probably men whose women are close-minded, prude, or just can’t suck their dicks right; on the other hand, a sex forum surveyed its users (please keep in mind, this is a very highly sexual group surveyed) and 1 girlfriend out of 10 in these men’s past, had this skill.   Out of their current relationships, it averaged about 9 out of the 100 men had current spouses or girlfriends who had this skill. Interesting stats, not sure how true it holds up if surveyed at a political forum or otherwise.  If this statistic were accurate, I wanted so bad to be that <10% of the talented few who could please her man.

Learning to deepthroat was a challenge for me, albeit a fun challenge.  Even before I started, my mind was ready to do it.  I just knew that I would be able to deepthroat so easily.  I knew that I would learn it quick and master it in a few minutes.  I couldn’t have been more wrong.

For my first attempt, my husband, Ryan, was laying down while I was between his legs.  Even though my mind was open and willing, my body just wasn’t on the same page.  I did a little of my normal dick sucking, stroking while only going about two inches down.  It would only be a matter of time before I go “all the way down.”  I didn’t warm myself up.  I let his head go over the area where my hard palate ended, but as soon as I did, my body went into self-preservation mode, closed up my throat, and gagged his dick out.  I didn’t realize it at the time, but thinking back, that’s exactly what happened: my throat blocked off his cock as soon as I felt like I was in “danger.”  Even with me closing off my throat, I kept trying to force his dick down, and in doing so I was hurting my throat.  I was mentally accepting to the idea of deepthroating, but I wasn’t physically accepting…yet.  Needless to say, I failed that day.  I was disappointed, but since it was only my first attempt I would chalk it up as part of the learning process.

The next day I tried a different position.  Instead of being between his legs I would be on his left side.  I hoped that the contour of his dick would work better with the angle of my throat.  In theory, this position should have worked easily.  In theory.  I started off slow, licking and sucking seductively.  It was the only thing I knew.  But like the day before, I panicked, closed off the entrance to my throat, and gag reflex kicked in again and again.  I didn’t throw up, but a little bit of stomach acid crept up my throat.  As soon as I felt this, I hastily pushed it down toward the entrance yet again.  Imagine gargling mouthwash and how you block off your throat to keep from swallowing it – the area in your mouth that the mouthwash touches is the only area his dick touched, i.e. not down my throat.  I should have learned from the previous day’s attempt that it won’t work when you’re doing it in frustration.  At this point I didn’t realize that your mind and body have to be in sync to accomplish something.

I decided to stop for a day and reassess my strategies.  What was I doing wrong?  Is my throat too small?  Is his dick too long?  Too hard?  Am I a slow learner or am I just not destined to learn this?

So the next day I wanted to try it by 69ing with me on top.  I was determined to keep looking until I found a way to get this right.  I started off how I usually do: sucking and licking, getting myself warmed up, as well as my husband.  Then I let his dick head rub my hard palate, coaxing and getting myself used to it being back so far.  My throat skin was not used to having something rub against it.  I gagged, but I pushed myself to keep going, then pulled his dick out.  I worked his head to the same spot and I gagged again.  I tried a third time, but then I started coughing and gagging.  Once I get the tickle feeling in my throat it just worsened until finally I have to stop.  Which is exactly what happened.

 

After a few weeks of trying, I was finally a little more successful.  Ryan was my male cheerleader: “That’s it…keep going a little lower…oh! Almost got it!”  His talking was making me nervous and throwing me off so I told him to be quiet and just let me work.  I closed my eyes, relaxed my throat muscles and my jaw bone, and let his dick head slowly creep onto my soft palate.  That wasn’t too bad, I thought to myself.  I pulled back and sucked and licked a bit.  After about a minute I was ready to try again.  His head glided over my soft palate again, this time getting very close to my tonsils.  I let it linger over the soft palate before finally popping it toward my uvula (the little flap of skin that hangs down that looks like a boxing speed bag) and for the first time, dipping down into my throat.  As I felt his dick hitting the back of my throat, then curve down and slide deeper into my esophagus, my husband asks, “Did you do it?  Did it go down your throat?”  Upset that he couldn’t tell, I pull up off his dick and ask, “What do you think?!”  What did I expect?  He’d never felt his dick deepthroated and I had never deepthroated.  I was so excited that I finally did it!  It happened so fast!  Once you get passed the threshold where your throat wants to reject his dick, you just have to push it back.  Like pulling a Band-Aid…you have to do it fast or you’ll feel fear and dread the entire time.

One of my biggest concerns was choking and coughing and not being able to pull his dick out in time so I end up biting down on him (which has never happened).  Feeling a cock in your throat is kind of like feeling of suspending the food in your throat.  Try it yourself.  Eat a piece of bread and swallow, but try to keep it from going down your throat.  You can’t.  Why?  Your throat muscles automatically push food down to keep your windpipe clear and allow air to pass in and out.  If you could keep food in your throat and go against your body’s reaction to keeping your throat clear, that is the feeling of deepthroating, which may be why a reason why it’s such difficult skill to learn.

During this session, I deepthroated a few times, trying to get my accustomed to this new accomplishment.  It wasn’t anything as impressive as what I do now as far as techniques.  I didn’t push my face all the down into his crotch, I didn’t do the “washing machine” technique, or any of the others that I can do now, but as they say, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Once I realized 69ing was the best platform to get accustomed with deepthroating, I knew I had to try that position again.  It was my best chance.  By now I’d been practicing for a few days and despite not learning to deepthroat as fast as I’d hoped, I was still determined.  I mounted my man and stuffed my mouth with his cock.  I felt my mouth getting fuller and fuller as it expanded.  I waited until he was at 80% fully erect.  I lathered up his cock with my spit and lowered my mouth down.  My confidence had been building since I believed I had already deepthroated several days before this moment.  It was muscle memory of sorts.  Was I able to do it this day?  Yes!  I felt his head pop past the soft flesh in the back of my mouth and down into my throat.  I pulled him out, and did it again. And again. And again. My husband had no doubt that this was deepthroating.  True deepthroating.  I bobbed my head faster, easier.  Not necessarily further down.  But I was doing it!  I felt Ryan stop sucking my clit as he wanted to enjoy every second his dick plunged into a place no dick has ever been.  Ryan didn’t cum; he could cum any time he wanted.  It wasn’t everyday he would feel his wife finally learn to deepthroat for the first time.

 

Continued: Deepthroating A Dildo The Size of My Forearm

 Originally posted on Nov 9, 2012.

Sleeping Nude

A few years ago I asked my wife to promise me she will never lay in bed with me wearing clothes. I noticed throughout the years, we began to change our sleep schedules, change where we slept (sometimes I would sleep in different rooms just to be more comfortable), and never woke up in each others’ arms. If my wife was already in bed wearing some shorts and a tank top, I may walk past her and rub her butt, but most of the time I would take my clothes off, hop in bed with my briefs, and go to sleep. Do not get me wrong, we still had a great sex life, but sex and “bedtime” were on totally different schedules. Like I said, we would have sex, then an hour later both be sleeping in king size beds in separate rooms. I like the room completely dark, she likes to sleep with the television on. I like to have a nice side fan blowing on my body, she doesn’t like the cold air.  To most couples this would seem like a huge problem, but we were both complacent.

The truth is, it was a problem. I no longer saw my wife as someone I wanted to hold all night, touch all night, scoot close and curl my stomach around her butt while rubbing my penis against her thighs. I was turning into a colder man who was affectionate during sex, but mentally not there afterwards. A lot of it had to do with my wife shutting down as she appreciated me less. If I wanted to try something new and different, she would agree, but didn’t show any enthusiasm. The sex was never bad, but it lost the feeling of two people in love.

Back to a few years ago. My wife and I both hit a point where we knew we loved each other, but we both had the mutual feeling of boredom. The complacency wasn’t enough. The sex without enthusiasm wasn’t enough. The lack of attention she got from me wasn’t enough.  The lack of openness in the bedroom for me wasn’t enough. We decided, as a couple, to fix it.  Of course, we both had to see the problem to want to fix it.  Our catalyst was the idea that were were no longer lovers or best friends, just roommates.   It needed fixing and we both agreed.

In breaking down a few reasons I had slipped during the years, I knew I never wanted to grow up and sleep with my wife like I was on a camping trip (fully dressed and ready to run in case a bear breaks into the camper). As a kid, I felt that one day I would marry a woman and each night we would lay nude together, her on my chest, talking about our day. I let my wife know that I want her to be nude for me in bed. I want to wake up in the middle of the night and touch her body. I want to know that if I roll over and hug her, we will both be nude. For various reasons, this helped rekindle that spark we had for each other when we first moved in together. I wanted to touch her again, I wanted to hug her all throughout the night, I wanted to rub myself on her and let her feel my naked body against hers. It was sex, without intercourse. A new form of intimacy that even as a new couple we didn’t appreciate. I could hold my nude body against hers for the entire night, falling in love again.

For me, this nudity came very easy. I love being nude, I love showing my wife my body, and I love to feel the freedom of things hanging where they hang. My wife had a harder time with this, as sometimes she would lay in bed with panties and a shirt, sometimes just her panties. I’d come across the bed and feel down her tummy to her thighs and immediately ask why she was wearing panties. She’d look at me, smile, and say she forgot because she wasn’t used to doing it. That’s all it took for her to remove her clothing, but she had to reverse what she had conditioned herself to do for her entire life. For her, sleeping nude didn’t come natural. She felt safe with more clothing. I wanted her to feel safe with me.

After a few months, I noticed my wife would only wear a robe around the house after a shower.  She may put on a sun dress or something simple, but she would not put on a bra or panties. Before bed, she’d slip off her outfit and lay in bed, nude, no covers, letting me see her body. If she is on her stomach reading, I know she wants me to lick and massage her. If she is on her back, I know she is getting tired and wants me to touch and make out with her before bed. She no longer forgets, in fact, it’s just the opposite. At night I will go out with my wife and notice she will not be wearing panties under her dresses. For whatever reason, she has taken a liking to her new freedom, and I enjoy knowing she is breaking out of her shell.  I want her to enjoy her body as much as I do, and how can I not give her attention knowing my wife is a hand slide away from me feeling her vagina or ass? I love it. I love being around her, I love talking to her, I love hearing what she has to say, because I feel close to her again. I feel like she wants me close to her. She wants me to touch her wherever I can.  She wants me to fuck her, whenever and wherever I can.  I feel like the effort she puts into letting me know she wants me turned on and near her, makes me try throughout the day to show her, I want to be near her. I want to live up to her appreciation. It’s more than just nudity, it’s the call of the wild. It helped  save our marriage, it helped our sex life, and it freed us from complacency.

-This article was originally written on November 4, 2012.   It was published September 30, 2013.

The Five-Second Kiss Rule #AdultSexEdMonth

longkiss

It seems that the longer a couple has been together, the more difficult it becomes to be affectionate with each other. Complacency, habit, and just plain being “used to each other” can get in the way of the need to remind the other about their commitments. The time they set aside for one another can easily become routine or mundane if they’re not consistent, so every couple should create their own ways of ensuring their love still burns in them, even if it only flickers.

Ryan and I are of the opinion that a happy couple should have sex every day of their lives, and both partners should remind themselves in their own heads, why they love their partner. A good relationship is hard work. If it seems easy, more than likely you are missing something. With everything you do well, whether it be your health, your hobbies, and even your job, the more you do certain tasks, the better you get. For instance, the more you go to the gym and exercise, the stronger and healthier you look. It’s hard work being fit and healthy. Well, a healthy relationship is the same. Finding time to be intimate, make love, and make your partner feel special should be a daily activity. Yes, even kissing.

Don’t misunderstand me though, I do not mean have sex just to have sex, or kiss just to kiss. A couple must practice intimacy and positive thinking. It’s not just a cliche message to think positive, it’s the reality of a strong relationship. If you kiss, hug, or make love to your spouse, as much as you moan or purr in your partners arms, you must purr to yourself as well. Make it a mental exercise to tell yourself how lucky you are to have your partner. If you show enthusiasm, show enthusiasm because it makes it exciting and fun for you, not just for your other half. Fake intimacy or sex done out of obligation is worse than no sex at all, for both of you — resentment resentment. A man or woman should look into their own minds and figure out why it’s important to not only have sex, but to love the sex each time you are with your partner. Enthusiasm, wanting each other, loving each others’ touch, and feeling each others’ bodies rub and create the friction we read about in romance novels.

The above is a good example of why couples need to abide by the five-second kiss rule. Not just with your lips touching, but with your hands touching each others faces, cheek smelling, and yes, a little tongue, at least once a day. This may sound like a silly robotic act, but a routine isn’t always bad thing. It’s a bad routine if you are ignoring your partner’s needs each day, and it quickly turns into a lifestyle. The opposite is also true. It’s a good routine if you are purposely being intimate with your spouse each day, it too will eventually become your lifestyle. If you prepare yourself for any major event in your life, whether it be a test, fight, sports match, or a marathon, usually you will plan a routine and follow rules to reach your maximum potential prior to the event. In this case, it’s the most important event of your life, your happily ever after. For us, there is nothing more accepting than kissing each other and holding our mouths together to see how the other responds. Ryan has told me that since we’ve been together, that if he has ever even slightly opened his lips while kissing, I’ve always let my tongue slide inside his mouth. Not aggressively or quick, but just the tip of my tongue to feel for his tongue. It is something I never really noticed, but it’s almost like an antennae. It’s instinct for me to reach out with one of the most sensitive organs in my body and feel to see if he is receptive. As interesting as that idea is, that also makes oral sex extremely intimate when put into this perspective (I love nothing more than feeling the tastes, shapes, and textures of my man’s penis and balls on my tongue – his most private possessions).  Ryan also noticed that I will wait for him to open his mouth before I initiate tongue play. It’s a team game, and you both do things you may not even notice, but if the love is present, it works. Of course, if we weren’t in love, we wouldn’t want to even kiss, let alone open our mouths and have the other stick their tongue in.

We don’t do this just for the pleasure of kissing, or even the possibility of sex to follow, it’s for the attachment we feel each day to the person we decided to spend the rest of our lives with. Our mouths are the dirtiest parts of our body, and although kissing is done in public and isn’t seen as a “dirty act“, the truth is, sticking your wet organ/tongue in another person’s wet body/mouth, swapping saliva and juices, and feeling each other’s lips is just as intimate as sex itself. Sex is taboo and private, which created a stigma with the act. Everyone wants to do what we can’t do, so sex became this important mountain in our relationships. In fact, some couples have built sex up so much that they (or their religion expects them to) wait until after marriage to enjoy each other sexually. However, kissing (being so close you almost breath the same air — as if you could save each other’s life with a sexual CPR) was acceptable. I’m not downplaying the importance of sex, but I am making a good argument for kissing being much more intimate and important than people think.  Under appreciated and neglected in aging relationships.  A physical connection and intimacy keeps your chemicals and hormones flowing, and if you follow your own guidelines to try your hardest to truly enjoy this physical time, you both will love each other more. No resentment for a man “wanting it too much” and no resentment from a woman “never giving me sex anymore.”

Kiss for 5 seconds everyday, or every time you say goodbye, or before you go to bed.  You won’t regret it.

Q&A: I hate swallowing my husband’s cum. Any tips on swallowing cum?

no swallow

Bitter cum face

Jasmine via the internet 

 Me and my husband have been married for over 5 years and until recently I never gave him any oral sex.  I’ve decided to change that.  I have been reading different blogs and websites, yours being one of them, and I am trying to open my mind and experience everything with my husband.   My only concern is, I have tried to swallow cum with my a previous boyfriend and I immediately threw up all over him.   I know that is bad, but it wasn’t just me spitting him out, I actually threw up from the taste of it, all over his lap.  After that episode I have maybe given a few more blow jobs but never let a guy finish in my mouth.   

Anyway, when I met my husband he told me from the beginning he just wants me happy.  I told him about my past, the good, the bad, and the embarrassing, and he immediately let me know that I would never have to do anything I was uncomfortable with.  Believe it or not, he has stuck to his words.  I’ve never felt any pressure from him about oral sex.  The few times  I came close to initiating, I got scared because too much time between us has passed and I feel embarrassed.  I also don’t know when to stop giving oral without hurting his feelings.   I do know that I want to give him oral sex because I love him more than anything in the world and he deserves it, but I know I will never be able to swallow his cum.   Do you guys have any suggestions? 

Venice’s response: 

Thank you for your question. I commend your husband for respecting your wishes about not asking you to give him oral sex or swallow.  If the taste of semen makes you throw up, that is just awful.  I know that me swallowing has made me closer to Ryan.  I yield a certain dominance over him when I tell him that no one can have his cum but me, that he better not be wasting all that precious juice.  I even get pissed off at the idea of him jacking off and wasting my cum. I’ve turned my cum swallowing into a game, a game where I make all the rules.

Remember this: I know it’s not apple juice, it’s cum, I get it.  But the THOUGHT of it, what it represents to ME as Ryan’s wife, makes it the most delicious thing in the world.  If you have to train yourself to love it, then do so!  I hate to make this comparison, but it’s like smoking a cigarette for the first time: you try it because of peer pressure or you want to impress the other cool kids.  At first you don’t want to do it, but you push through it, even forcing yourself.  You start gagging and coughing.  It’s the worst feeling ever when it burns your throat.  But you see everyone doing it and you want to fit in.  So you smoke another one; same reaction. You repeat this process until finally one day, your body is used to it and needs it.  Now the cool kids are hanging around you all because you have this one thing in common.  Well, pretend your husband is the cool kid and you want to impress him.

Also, I commend you for trying to initiate.  It shows that you are willing to do it!  My suggestion would be to take baby steps.  If you do initiate oral sex, squeeze his penis hard after he has an erection for a few minutes and you will notice a clear sticky drop will appear around his urethra opening.  This is his froth.  This is the lubrication his body naturally provides to make sure his penis can penetrate the vagina.  I personally think froth is very sweet.   It has its own taste and texture.  I think that would be a better approach to having him shoot his load into your mouth.  Don’t take a whole load at once for the first time with your husband. Just a drop or two, or a small lick off his stomach.  Let it sit on your tongue for a moment.  You’ll realize it’s not disgusting and certainly not poison.

Remind yourself that this is your husband’s semen, the man that you love, the man who would do anything to protect you.  It’s been five years and he hasn’t even suggested you give him oral sex.  He sounds like one of the patient understanding ones.  Wait to see how patient and understanding he will be after you blow his socks off. Once you give him oral sex on a regular basis, and possibly even swallowing him, new doors will open and you will both benefit from your new-found sexuality. “I will never be able to swallow his cum.” Never say never.

Ryan’s response: 

First, thanks for reading our blog. I am glad you want to open up and try new things with your husband.  5 years is a bit long but it’s better than 10 years I suppose.

Oral sex does not have to involve any sort of “completion”.  Sometimes Venice will give me oral sex just to get me erect and use her saliva to lubricate my penis for anal or vaginal intercourse.  Every morning Venice wakes me up kissing on my neck, then under my arms, then each of my nipples, until finally she gets between my lap and will lick and suck on all of my sexual body parts.  Sometimes she will focus on my balls, other times she will lick and suck on my penis.  I never orgasm.   We both know our morning time is for intimacy and enjoying each other, not to get worked up and have orgasms.   It’s our way to show self control and appreciation for each other without turning kissing and closeness  into pure sex.

Those are just a few examples of giving your husband the oral sex he deserves without having to taste his semen.    The key here, like with most questions, is communication.  Talk with your husband and let him know you feel nervous but want to give him oral sex.  I promise you, he will embrace the idea.  Let him know that you would prefer to give him oral as a form of foreplay, rather than a finishing act.  Explain why.  If he has been as patient as you say he is, I have no doubt he will totally understand.   Also, if he knows oral is now something you are interested in trying, he will help initiate, taking away any of the embarrassment you may have felt before.

Now, let’s talk about the taste and idea of semen.  If you think your husband’s semen gross, it will be gross.  If you think his semen is the next best thing since honey, it will be honey.   Whether it be the texture, the taste, the smell, or just the idea from it coming from inside another human’s body, it’s all in your mind.  Let go of the childhood belief and grow into the woman he deserves.  Semen should be everything but gross.  That is the essence of your man, his being, his manhood, his ancestors, his past and his future, his dna, his seeds, his insides, his everything.   His semen is an extension of him.  Enjoy and take your man, all of him.   It isn’t gross or disgusting, and it definitely shouldn’t make you puke.   Free your mind and let it grow with your relationship.    If a man went down on a woman and puked because her juices tasted weird to him, what would you think?  It’s immature and young minded.  As we grow older we learn to appreciate the finer things in life:  the juices inside our partners being one of them.

Venice’s suggstions on  swallowing cum:

Deepthroat.  Our blog has gone into great detail about how I taste nothing, feel nothing, and smell nothing.  If I am deepthroating, Ryan’s semen bypasses all my taste buds and  goes straight to my stomach.   For me, this is definitely neat, especially since you can feel his balls on your lips squeezing with each thrust.  You can also feel his thick urethra tube at the base of his penis, where his kegel muscles are the most powerful, pushing his semen into my body.  For me, the downside is I love to taste Ryan and his cum.  Therefore, I enjoy letting him unload his first shot into my mouth and then slide him down my throat to enjoy the experience of his orgasm.  This is the best of both worlds.

If you cannot deepthroat, try having him cum as far as he can in the back of your mouth.  The goal is to get his semen past your taste buds.  This may not help with the texture, but if the taste if what bothers you, this will help.

Get drunk.    Most of us are just looking for a reason to lose our inhibition.  That 4th or 5th shot of alcohol doesn’t taste anything like the first shot right?  Well guess what, your husbands semen will taste like buttersworth syrup after a few drinks.

Use chloraseptic or some other numbing agent for sore throats.  Not only does the choloraseptic have an decent flavor, but it also numbs the mouth and throat.  This can help you with gagging during deepthroat, or keep you from tasting and feeling the texture of his semen.   Chloraspetic can also numb the taste buds which keep you from tasting anything.

Give him oral in the morning.  I’ve read that the gag reflex is the least active in the morning.  Wake up, brush your teeth, give your man a blow job, swallow his load, head off to work.  This lazy morning gag reflex can also help you get his penis deep in your mouth if you normally deal with a super sensitive gag reflex.

Wash down the semen with something sweet.  Whether it be a coke or cold drink, wash down the semen so the after taste doesn’t make you gag or puke.  Think of his semen as the alcohol and you can pick your own chaser.

Suck on a jolly rancher, tic tac, or a breath mint before oral sex.   If you are skilled enough, keep the jolly rancher in your mouth while working his shaft.  I know this may sound hard, which it may be, but it will  definitely help with the taste.

 Ask your husband to eat pineapples  the night before you give him oral sex.  It is rumored that pineapples make the semen taste much better.   Experiment with different foods and see if it changes his semen’s flavor.

The biggest problem is your mind.  I’d guarantee if you have trouble swallowing, you are the type that overthinks things.  Relax, enjoy life, enjoy your man, take your mind off swallowing semen and think of something sweet.  Truthfully, this is all in your mind.  Grow up.

Practice by taking cum shots in the mouth without swallowing.  This could be something you while taste testing his semen/food intake.   The more you let him cum in your mouth the more you will get used to the texture and flavor.  As you get more relaxed and comfortable, swallowing will get much easier.

Use flavored lubrication.   Use honey!  Although you won’t really need lubrication with oral sex, if you were to lube up your husband’s penis with flavored lubrication, like syrup or honey, the sweet flavor taste will overwhelm your tastebuds.  The sticky sensation may also be amazing for his balls or anus play.  Try it.

We will update this section as we think of more helpful tips in swallowing sperm.

Hypothetically Speaking: The Reality of Us Swinging

SwingersAs we understand it, swinging is one couple having sexual relations with another couple. However, there are grey areas here as some single men are also in the swing lifestyle. Although I’d disagree with this, I’d consider a single man in the “get ass any way I possibly can lifestyle.” If he isn’t sharing or letting someone explore his intimate other, he isn’t swinging. I’ve heard some couples compare the single man in the swinging lifestyle to a parasite. But other than that, the crowd is usually open-minded, as you would have to be to accept other couples into your bedroom. Either way, there are different types of swinging, like there are different types of porn. You have your hard swingers and your soft swingers. Hard swinging is swapping partners, either same or different room. Full intercourse, oral, anal, whatever. Each partner swaps and they enjoy themselves however they like, or however they have set up their own personal boundaries with their partners. Soft swinging is not quite as hardcore, but it is how most swingers start out. Same room sex but you remain with your own partner. There may be some touching of other partners, female on female if the ladies are bi, and possibly oral, but that is a grey area. I’d feel oral crosses over into the hard swinging, but what if it’s just a man eating you out while your partner has sex with you. That isn’t quite like watching your husband watching you suck off another man in front of him. With the different types of oral, different boundaries, oral would still be considered soft swinging by most couples.

With that said, we are lifetime members of swinglifestyle.com but have never met with any couples. We’ve conversed and explored different ideas, but never set up any dates to meet any couple because the idea turns us on more than the actual idea of sharing. We are stingy.

Then came Twitter…

Twitter has allowed us to talk to many amazing people we would otherwise not talk to in real life. What’s even better is we get to delve into their lives via pictures and endless overlapping conversations with 140 characters or less, every letter counts, which in turn either makes you a “parts 2 and 3” tweeter or a succinct one.

With me being bi-curious and Ryan being open-minded, we can talk about our likes and dislikes about the fetishes, preferences, and people in general. Recently we had a discussion about swinging. We both agreed that we would never hard swing. Neither of us have the desire to give ourselves to anyone else. Soft swinging, on the other hand, is something we might consider since there are boundaries and no partner swapping.

With that out of the way, we discussed what we would both be comfortable with.  Ryan has no interest in seeing me suck or fuck another man, AT ALL.  He is open-minded with certain things, but he has no interest in sucking or being fucked by another man.  I understand this.   We are both stubborn, but we’d like to think we are open and very non judgemental. Neither of us would ever settle for less just to get our rocks off. A lifetime of regret isn’t worth 30 minutes of experimentation, and I plan on being with Ryan for my lifetime. It’s this same attitude that keeps either of us from cheating. We both love each other and we can openly talk about our lusts and desires without getting mad at one another. As long as I do not judge him and try to understand, he seems to be okay with opening up with me about different scenarios.

For me, the bi-girl in the other couple could do whatever she wanted with me, but her interaction with Ryan would be limited. Maybe touching him, maybe helping with oral sex, but definitely no penetration. (***this has now changed as I do not mind penetration for small periods of time as long as I am in control of his dick and using it to spoon out her juices and eat her off his dick).  I would let her kiss me with Ryan’s cum in my mouth if she wanted, but I don’t want to see Ryan ever fucking another woman. Ryan has said he is totally okay with that and has explained to me that he would not be offended if me and the girl had little to no boundaries with each other. I would let her do whatever she wanted with me, including me or her putting a strap-on on and working each other’s pussies over. I think most men, including Ryan, wouldn’t have an issue with this. But the bi-woman looking to jump in with a couple is called a “unicorn” for a reason.

As far as couples go, this is pretty simple.  Soft swinging is all we’d consider.    Us girls can play if we get along and want to.  The guys can watch (***we have moved away from the idea of soft swinging, as the idea of being watched turns us both off).   Our own personal boundaries are the same, regardless of the  female or a couple.  We have no interest in seeing the other have oral sex (***this has also changed, as I am okay with Ryan and I eating out a woman together) or sex with another person, but are definitely okay with playful touching and being licked respectfully.    This would be totally up to the other couple, as we understand our boundaries are   pretty constricted.   Otherwise, we would be into same room play and watching the other couple get off while we did the same.  That sounds kinky and fun.

I talked with Ryan today and we both decided this would be a good blog topic. Other than our faces we have been very open with our readers, trying to keep everything as authentic as we can. We aren’t the greatest couple in the world, but we are honest and sincere with our strengths and shortcomings. We may flirt on Twitter, but our love is stronger than the need for retweets. With good communication and strong boundaries it is possible to enjoy flirting and teasing others, but still be very faithful to your spouse.

What do you think?

Originally posted:  Dec, 12, 2012.

***Edited on December 9, 2013.   Look how much has changed in a year?!   Our boundaries have opened a bit but we have abandoned the idea of “soft swinging”.  Although we are open minded enough to understand why some couples do this, we learned that we are not  into being watched or playing in front of another couple.  Ryan isn’t comfortable and I absolutely only have the desire to play with other women.  Instead we have opened up our bedroom to threesomes and looking for a female partner that turns us both on and fits our mold.