Q&A: My boyfriend said if I start a blow job it is wrong to stop until he is done.

My boyfriend said if I start a blow job it is wrong to stop until he is done.

I’ve been in a relationship for about 7 months now. It’s my first sexual relationship and I’ve been trying to learn whatever I can, but I’m still new so be nice please.

I wanted to ask a question here because my partner said something and I’m just not 100% sure about it. I’m not able to give oral for a long time because I get sore, and when I tried to tell my bf I wanted to stop he kept saying to keep going because it’s wrong to stop before finishing and that it’s painful to be left hard. I kept going and he orgasmed without warning me.

I feel really bad but it sounded odd cause don’t guys get hard randomly a lot? I don’t know a lot so I apologize if this is a stupid question. I just don’t want to be a bad partner.

Nessa’s response to stop blow job

First off, you do not have to finish a blow job until he orgasms if you do not want too.  However, if your goal is to be good at giving oral sex, then yes, it’s good to learn how to get your boyfriend off during a blow job.  I try to focus on the positive while giving oral sex, because that is what keeps me enthused and motivated.  However, completion is not a requirement.  He seems a bit inexperienced and one-track minded.  Some men, especially selfish and inexperienced lovers, tend to funnel vision on the end goal: cumming.   If you are sore and he has to cum, suggest alternatives.  Personally I wouldn’t want to tease Ryan and then just stop.  I enjoy making him orgasm and want him to get his release.  In fact, it’s why I enjoy my intimate time with him.  I like knowing when I leave for work, or go to bed for the night, he is happy and has had his release.  To be honest, I don’t really want him to masturbate.  I know, if I wasn’t in his life, he would have probably masturbate each day to relieve himself.  He did prior to meeting me for sure.  Why would I expect that to change because I am in his life?  A sexy, attractive, woman, he has to lay next to and live with?  And now he has to wait to get off just because I’m in his life?  That doesn’t sound right.

If you wanted him to tell you before he orgasms, make sure you communicate that you want to know when he is going to finish.  If you are new to sex, then I assume he is fairly new to sex as well.  Some men, especially younger men, do not learn to be vocal, or even moan, until they are told by their girls.  Ryan didn’t make a sound until I told him I wanted to hear him.  Imagine a guy masturbating alone and talking to himself, or moaning in his bathroom while he strokes himself.  We learn to get off, quiet as a mice.  So him not saying anything could simply be he isn’t used to announcing he is about to cum.  That sounds like miscommunication and inexperience.  Make sure you let him know you want to hear him, you want to know when he is going to orgasm, and when you get sore, find alternatives to helping him get off.  

Ryan’s response to stop blow job

If your boyfriend is suggesting you have to finish a blow job once you start, meaning you can not switch to other intimate acts to help him finish, your boyfriend is being immature and selfish.  He could move onto having sex with you, masturbate in front of you, receive a hand job, or do something else you would be okay with to finish him/himself.   Although I admit, the question isn’t completely clear.  Are you suggesting you’d give him a blow job and just stop and expect him to pull his pants back and wait till another day?  That would definitely give a guy a mean case of blue balls.  Yes men get erections.   And yes sometimes we can’t relieve ourselves every time we have ever had erections, especially in public (I haven’t had an erection in public since maybe the 8th grade).  However, we didn’t have a mouth on our penises, we didn’t have our balls tighten up and feel the slight edging sensation, nor were we in a position to finish.  I would say, if I had an erection in private, I wouldn’t just ignore it.  I’d always relieve myself if I could.  If I didn’t, it was because I couldn’t.   I guess it depends on the situation.  If he is suggesting you have to finish a blow job if you start it, he would be wrong.  You do not have to finish anything you do not want to.  A blow job doesn’t mean you keep going until he cums.  A blow job can be foreplay, teasing, or just a way to get him hard for penetration.  He is telling the truth that getting stimulation and being extremely turned on, and then stopping, sucks (pun).  If you are sore, I’d assume you’d be okay with doing other things to help him get off?  

Sorry if my answer wasn’t completely clear.   

Ladies can wear lingerie but what sexy things can men wear to turn women on?

Women can wear whatever they want to turn on a man; however, for men, this is a different game.  Nessa has told me that if I wear anything but Manview briefs, it’s equivalent to her wearing granny panties.   Since the day she said that to me I went on a buying spree to buy as many Manview briefs as I can.  I have no idea who even makes them, so who knows when they will just vanish off the market.  I’m hoping to buy enough to last me a lifetime! male lingerie

No, we have never been sent free items from Manview.  We have no idea who makes them and order them randomly from eBay!

I won’t go much further into Manview briefs because I believe they aren’t the answer to a woman in lingerie.  In fact, I’d say they are a bit emasculating and riding the line of overly twink.  However, if your woman wants to see you in male  lingerie, you can always search for sexy underwear for men.   This is a slippery slope fellas.  Be careful!  It’s easy to go from Manview briefs, get a bit risky and start living on the underwear edge, and then start shopping for the worst men’s underwear ever made.

In this article we will try to focus on the manly things a man can wear that women are attracted to.  In fact, we’ve asked the question to anonymous females on Reddit and they seem to have come with some pretty cool ways for a man to turn women on with what he wears.

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Q&A: I had sex for the first time and failed. What should I do?

I had sex for the first time and failed. What should I do?

For a bit of background I am clueless when it comes to girls. I’ve never had a girlfriend before. I have never kissed a girl. I have never held a girls hand. I’ve always been very self conscious about my looks and never thought any female would find me attractive so I never really even bothered trying.

I have been hanging out with this girl for the whole summer. She went to my high school and moved before graduation. She is back for the summer and we have been hanging out nearly every day. Just getting food, smoking weed, watching TV. Normal stuff. She invited me up to her room to check out her current living situation etc. I sit on her bed as there really is no where else to sit. She is showing me some new music she downloaded on her computer and after a while she showed me some funny YouTube videos.

The whole time she is inching closer and being very touchy etc. My dumbass did not pick up on any of these signs. Like I said earlier I didn’t think any girl would be attracted to me. Especially not one this pretty. So it’s getting late and she asks me to spend the night, i asked here where i should crash. She said I could just sleep in her bed with her. So i laid down under the blanket and was about to go to sleep when she gets in my face, maybe an inch or two away. She puckers her lips and closes her eyes. I literally and stupidly said, “what are you doing” and she said “what does it look like” and I said “it looks like you are trying to kiss me” she started laughing and that’s when my dumbass realized what was going on. We made out passionately for maybe five minutes. (I got my first kiss hooray!) Then she began taking my pants off and gave me my first ever hand and blow job (hooray again). She said she is usually really good and quick but I was very nervous and lasted a very long time. Her jaw began to hurt and i told her not to sweat it. Not sure why but I could not finish for the life of me.

She is talking extremely dirty and is asking for it, I talk dirty back and tell her I would give it to her etc. Well i got a condom on and she got on her knees into the doggy position. I have never seen a vagina let alone been in one at this point. Keep in mind it is very dark. I couldn’t find the hole to make things simple. She tried to help guide it in etc but it was just continously slipping out. She is very tall so it put me in a very awkward position. I could hardly reach and when I got it in it would come out easily because for one I am not yall and for two she has a rather large butt and my dick really is not very big either. Also I couldn’t manage to get fully erect with the condom on.

I felt super embarrassed and just sorta stopped after a few more attempts etc. I apologized profusely and she said I was fine and that it’s ok. I told her I was sorry I couldn’t satisfy her and she said something along the lines of no problem. I could tell from her tone she was bummed out. She put her clothes on and I suggested maybe I just go.

I’m at home writing this now and I hate myself smh. I dont know what to do. If I should try again, if that would be too awkward, if she doesnt even want to try again or even see me. Worst part is she doesn’t know I’m a virgin. Should I tell her? I really am bummed out, I didnt think sex would be this difficult. At the same time I am pleased to finally have kissed a girl and received oral. Amazing feeling šŸ™‚

Nessa’s response to had sex for the first time

For sure tell her that was your first time.   Had she known prior, she may have helped you a little more or not turned around so you would have to penetrate for the first time doggy style.  Not an easy position for a first timer!

Good ole fashion missionary would have been the way to go.  A good way to get her missionary is to go down on her, run your tongue through her vagina…maybe look at it closely and study it so when you try to stick your penis in it later, you know what you are doing!   And then you can add another first, the first time you ate a girl out.  Out of all those first times, that one is the most important in my opinion!  But maybe I’m bias.

Ryan’s response to had sex for the first time

I’m all about being open and honest.  If she talks with you again, let her know that was your first time.  Believe it or not, she won’t judge you in a negatively.  That’s kind of a guy thing.  Guys can be bullies when it comes to virginity.  She will probably find it adorable.  

Congrats on your first kiss, first blow job, first hand job, and the first time having sex.  Even if it was just a little penetration, that’s pretty much a grand slam right there.  It didn’t go as you planned, but that’s pretty much how everyone’s first time goes.  

Sex Toy Review: Kiiroo Onyx 2 and Pearl 2 for Couples Set / for Long Distance Relationships

First, let’s start off by saying this is one of the coolest ideas we have ever heard of; however, technology just may not be able to keep up yet.  We will split this review up into both of our opinions since it is two separate toys that work together via Bluetooth.  Before we get into the review of the actual product, let’s make sure we give a big thank you to the UK based Scarlet Rooms.  Their customer service, speed of delivery, and ease to work with was bar none one of the best we have dealt with so far.  

Ryan:  The Kiiroo Onyx 2 has an idea that could be one of the most amazing experiences a man could have with a sex toy.  Through VR, or through watching a POV (point of view) video, the Onyx 2 actually massages your penis to the exact same movements you see in the video.  For instance, if a girl is stroking a penis in a video, the Onyx 2 strokes you in the same rhythm.  If she is sucking fast, it also moves fast.  In the video we viewed, it was two women giving a blow job, and this thing was able to keep up with the video and vibrate to the exact same movements.  Unfortunately the Onyx 2 randomly stopped and we’d have to move it around for it to start vibrating again.  Unsure if this was a connectivity issue, but either way, I’m going to have a hard time orgasming playing Red Light / Green Light with my masturbator!   We had the same problem when we connected the item to the female compatible device, the Pearl 2.  It would randomly disconnect and go quiet for a few seconds, then come back to life by touching the sensitivity slider.  Maybe it has a mechanism that turns itself off if it thinks it isn’t being used?

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Would You Get a Tattoo of Your Wife’s Name On Your Penis Instead of a Wedding Ring?

tattoo on penisWould You Get a Tattoo of Your Wife’s Name On Your Penis Instead of a Wedding Ring?

If marriage is really forever ever, and ever ever…. call your local tattoo shop, get ready to be slightly humiliated, and grab a towel to bite down on fellas! 

The first question I usually get regarding a tattoo on my penis is, “Did it hurt?”  Tattoo on my dick or a Tattoo on my Penis.

Does Getting A Tattoo On Your Penis Hurt?

No, it didn’t hurt.  After years of rubbing up and down on this thing with my hand, driving it in mouths and rubbing it against teeth, my dick has the rigidness of elephant skin.   Going back and forth inside of a woman’s tight vagina 100s of a times in a fuck session is going to leave your dick more sore than a tattoo.  Therefore, a tattoo on my penis was nothing.

Is a Tattoo of Her Name on Your Penis Commitment or Dumb?

I think it is a bit of both.   I don’t care though.   Personally, I don’t really need a perfect dick, nor did I ever have one.  Random threesomes may have a quick awkward moment before the other girl puts her mouth around your penis, but that’s about the extent of it.  If we decide to fuck other girls, it has Nessa’s name on it.  Which she loves.  When she says to the other girl, ‘You look so pretty sucking my dick…”  She means it.   Tattoo on my dick or a Tattoo on my Penis.

Much like how Andy wrote his name on the bottom of Woody’s foot, Nessa has written her name on the top of my dick.  

Where Can You Get A Tattoo On Your Penis at?

Any tattoo shop will probably do this for you; however, it will cost a lot more.  Much like shipping and handling adds to the cost of things you buy, tattooing your dick also has a handling charge.  If you aren’t comfortable with being nude, or having another man hold your penis while drawing on it, then the wedding ring option may be more for you.  More than likely you will have to get a male tattoo artist.  Either way, bring your wife with you so she can enjoy the tattoo experience with you.  If you end up with a female artist, she may appreciate that you aren’t some pervert and brought your wife with you to ease the tension.  

If you really don’t want to do it at a public shop, you could do it at home yourself. It may cost a bit more for a tattoo machine though.

How Do They Tattoo Your Penis?  Do You Have to Be Erect?

No you do not have to be erect.  They will take your flaccid penis and wrap it around a small sterile bat shaped object.  This will tighten your skin and enable the tattoo artist to tattoo whatever it is you need onto your penis.   In fact, much like the photo above, you can see my penis wrapped around Nessa’s wrist. That is the exact process.  Except you aren’t going to wrap your penis around the wrist of the tattoo artist.  Once it is tight and stretched, you will be surprised at how easily it can be tattooed.

A Cheaters Mark of Shame

After getting the tattoo on my penis years ago, I searched around online to see if there were any other examples of what I had done.  I saw pictures of elephants trunks, dragons tails, and various other funny things, but didn’t really see much else.  However, I did read an interview with a female tattoo artist that said she noticed that men that cheat tend to be the ones that asked her to tattoo their dicks.  It seems a penis tattoo shows the ultimate recommitment for a cheating man trying to prove his loyalty.  So much so, women take back their cheating husbands thinking, “If he tattooed his dick, he must be sorry.  That other girl doesn’t have her name on his cock.”

That sounds pretty desperate, but in a way, that may subconsciously explain why I had my own penis tattooed.  Although I have never cheated, I was a virgin when I met Nessa.  I am very proud of that.  The more girls we hooked up with together, the more guilty and disloyal I felt. I felt guilty because I enjoyed it.  I felt disloyal because I wanted it.  I felt greedy because I knew I didn’t want to stop and go back to a monogamous lifestyle.  

I had always told Nessa that my dick is her dick.  Her vagina is my vagina.  If my dick goes inside another girl, it’s our dick.  She loves to see it.  Although the pleasure is physically connected to me (I’ve still never had an orgasm from another woman’s body), mentally, it’s our  experience. As dumb as that may seem to those not in the lifestyle, it makes sense to us.   In fact, I meant it so much that I tattooed her name on our dick.   And I don’t regret it.  So in a way, tattooing my dick was also my form of recommitting myself to her.

Without her, I don’t need it.

Would You Get A Tattoo On Your Penis?

Would you tattoo your wife’s name on your dick rather than wearing a wedding ring?  If you are polyamorous, would you use your dick as a chalk board and just tattoo various women’s names on your penis to show your commitment (bad joke)?